STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT COMPLAINTS

How do you feel about complaints? Do you think that people are complaining way to much and do you maybe feel like complaining about them? So, that you would say to yourself: “Oh, this person is always complaining. He or she will never be happy. I get so tired from listening to that crap!” Maybe you like to tell him/her: “Stop complaining!”

But occupying yourself with those thoughts, do you realize: “What happens to my own energy or vibrational pattern?”

Written by Suzette Lyn Michaelsen and Jens W. Pedersen

When we think about “STOP” it is a kind of opposition and another kind of negativity or intolerance. You may actually say that it is a complaint. It is of course normal for us to want something to stop or to go away. But it is not the best kind of focus. If we want something to change then it is better to focus on what is wanted instead of focus on the unwanted – cause we attract what we are thinking about.

Therefore it is important to let things be the way they are cause then we don’t use our energy in the wrong way. If we oppose something people say or do, or if we oppose our own thoughts, then, actually, we put energy into those thoughts, words and doings. This is likely to only make them stronger and more prevalent, generating more of those kind of vibrations in our own lives.

Why do we complain anyway?

Expectations
When someone fail to meet our expectations we start complaining. It is very common in relationships. It is like the man should help with the dishes or else the woman will complain or vice versa. Or maybe when dating, the woman expects that he will pay the bills or she will complain about him.

Conditions
A condition is a bit like an expectation. It is when we demand for someone to behave in a certain way for us to love or accept them. So it is conditional love. For instance in a parent and children relationship. The parents demand, that the child behave and respect them and if not they will complain and disagreement begins.

This is also a dominant issue in immigration: “This is actually a very big thing to Danish integration. The government want us, the immigrants, to act and live like Danes and assimilate into Danish society. It is not possible, though, because we have different life experiences. But if the immigrants don’t meet those conditions people react and complain.” – Suzette Lyn Michaelsen

Judging
This is very common everywhere, for instance at work. Some people get stuck on a specific negative perception about another person’s abilities or character. So they will focus only on the mistakes and failures of that person. For instance, a woman is doing good work at her machinery, but one little mistake causes lots of complaints from her co-workers.

Resistance
This goes on at a subconscious level. In the Law of Attraction it is said that resistance consists of fears and doubts. As a result of a human defence mechanism, people complain to hide their own insecurity. So you feel bad about yourself and because of that you get angry or annoyed with someone else, pointing your fingers at that person.

Comparison
Complaints may be due to comparison. So for instance, a woman is talking gossip and slander to her social circle about the life of some rich person they know. She complains about the luxurious and extravagant lifestyle of this person. But actually, she want to put that person down to hide her envy for she is less successful.

Lack of understanding
We don’t really understand why bad things happen in our lives. It does not make sense to us and because of that we complain, thinking: “Why am I so unlucky?” So we complain because we consider us self to be like innocent victims. This is why we need to understand much better how energy works and that everything is a reflection of our own minds.

Be mindful and allowing

Rather than complaining and picking on somebody it is better to be mindful which is observing but not judging. Just let those annoying people be. In mindfulness it is often said, that we should observe life like we observe clouds in the sky. We know it is futile to try and make them go away, so we let them come and go not using much energy on that.

Mindfulness training is good for peace of mind. And this is an important lesson also according to The Law of Attraction that we must accept before we are able to chance. We are not supposed to oppose or fight the behaviour of other people. Nor should we fight our own thoughts but only direct them into a good vibrational pattern.

Complaining is a good subject since we may use that term for every kind of “not allowing”, that is also not allowing our own behaviour, thoughts, feelings and desires. So, complaining may be both internal and external – we may complain about our neighbour doing this or that but also we may complain about ourselves. For instance, I might think: “I ought to be able to work more hours!” Or: “I am useless for finding a girlfriend!” and so forth.

When complaining you get disconnected

What if I were to use those words externally, and for instance tell things like that to a friend of mine? Saying: “You ought to be able to work more hours!” Or: “You are useless for finding a girlfriend!” and so on. I would easily get into a conflict, maybe even lose my friend if I kept on talking to him like that. But how often do you say those things to yourself? Is it not on a regular, everyday basis that would certainly cause internal damage?

When I use those words inside myself it is also a conflict and an unloving behaviour towards myself – causing me to lose my internal friendship with who I am or my Inner Being. And this is why it hurts. Doing that, I am disconnecting me from myself. Or in the words of LOA, I am not “aligned” with my Source.

So, for that reason don’t complain about yourself – but also don’t tell yourself to stop complaining (that is just another complaint). Instead be patient with yourself and start using nice words. Let go of internal as well as external complaints and start thinking about what you like and appreciate about yourself, everyone and everything. That will create a loving vibrational pattern attracting to you more of the same kind and causing you to live your life in love.

“It’s a match!” Make it happen with The Law of Attraction

If you want to be lucky in love there is something else apart from knowing your dating techniques. In this article, we introduce the Law of Attraction as laid out by American Abraham Hicks. And we illustrate that theory using our own life examples. Hopefully you will be able to recognize the workings of “energy” or “spirit” and to benefit from that in your own dating.

Written by Suzette Lyn Michaelsen and Jens W. Pedersen

“It’s 13:05. I’m off now from work. I must hurry home because I made an appointment with my friends.  Yeah! We’re planning to get lunch at the restaurant. I’m late and I still need to get dressed. Oh God! Time is running!

Now, that I am done with my vanity, it’s my car that should be fixed. “Oh yea! I need some gasoline!”  I hate it when I need to do it myself, while I am wearing high heels and a decent dress.

Oh no! Why is that guy looking at me? Is something wrong with the way I am holding this gasoline thing? Oh my God, he is coming! He probably will tell me not to hold it that way or whatever!

But no, that’s how it is: He just wants my telephone number. He is opening an opportunity to get to know me better.”

This is one typical story in Suzette’s life, but why does she attract men like that?

Law of attraction
Suzette is practising the “Law of Attraction” in her daily life. It gives her courage, self-esteem, satisfaction, enthusiasm and happiness in everything she does. Since she practised this method of living, she could always feel the energy in every second of her daily life.

In the language of Law of Attraction it is called “alignment to the Vortex”, which means you flow easily inside—because you are joined with the whole of that which you are.

Even if she is single, she is fine for she believes in “The romance magnet”. She let her radar activated to attract the perfect match. This practice gives her a blissful, colourful and joyful life compared to having a partner who never made her exultant.

There is something called “The desperate dater”. This is someone who is afraid of missing out. And trying to be loved by doing what others want. Or maybe that person will be searching for a partner because he or she is expected to.

We may come to think that we are not successful unless we are in a relationship. Some even think that we must be partners for more than half of our life, and so they believe that number of years is evidence of success.

Now, this fearful attitude and motivation is not beneficial when dating. The law of attraction reveals that success is not about numbers, moments, pictures or description. Perfect romance is about how content and happy you are within.

Jens tells a story about how this high energy works in extraordinary ways:

“Years ago I met a girlfriend using online dating. I used this method for a long time and I had many, many dates before her.

She, on the other hand, only did the following: She set up a free profile that lasted for one day only. She spent a few hours searching through many profiles and then contacted me. Only me. She said that my profile was the only one where she liked both pictures and text.

So, she sent a message with her phone number, and I called her. On our first date, a man came by and gave us two tickets for a show at The Royal Theater that same evening – so it became a very long date and the start of a long-term relationship.

This unusual story contains elements of something that looks very much like luck or coincidence. But I think many good love stories are like that.

I often wondered, though, why it was so easy for her, whereas I had to go through all sorts of dates before meeting the right one.

And if it is not to be considered luck or mere chance, then I think it must be due to our individual energies or wishes. Maybe I just didn’t know very well what I was looking for. In the words of Law of Attraction her “radar” apparently worked much better than mine.”

So now, let’s explore the radar in further detail.

Know yourself or inner being
Practising Law of Attraction, the one who is in alignment comes on our radar. No one else will show up. To ensure that, we should first visualize the perfect person who can match our desire. Make a list of what that person will be like.

The list should, however, come from your inner self’s desire. Not from an outer source like somebody else’s expectation. It is not a rich guy or a beautiful girl that our surroundings will approve of.

The list should only consist of those traits that will match you and bring you to the Vortex, that is the feeling of being at peace, in high spirits and abundant.

In Jens’s story his desire is not clear for him to activate his vibration and energy. So that will complicate things.

Suzette explains how she stays true to herself in order to activate her vibration:

“We think wearing trendy clothes and shoes will attract the opposite sex. But by doing this, you are just pleasing others to make them like you.

I am only using the same colour of lipstick since I learned to wear it. Every summer I have the same style of clothes and shoes. It feels good to be myself. No matter what the trendy jeans looks like, I always wear dresses.

I actually don’t wear the most sexy dresses and shoes. And I was never into breast augmentation to attract men.

We should follow our hearts desire. If an intelligent man will match you and will bring you to the Vortex, so don’t doubt it. If a good sexual experience will match you and will bring you to the Vortex, so don’t doubt it.

Follow your intuition, manifest yourself and focus, then Law of Attraction will be activated and the right one comes onto your radar”.

It is important to know your inner self. And from that knowing you are able to send out authentic wishes.

It is a matter of focus or directing energy. But in order to do that it must be balanced, so that what you do is a projection of your inner being or soul.

Then it turns into a high energy or strong force. On the other hand if you are not tuned into that inner being it will not work very well.

Jens’s real life examples show the importance of focused energy and also how that energy may be lost:

“Sometimes I really want to meet girls and that focus turns into a lot of matches on dating apps. But for some reason I get discouraged: I doubt it. I am not really into her. There may be too many matches, and it’s too much for me, so I get stressed out or tired.

And then suddenly some of them disappear. Or the energy between us is lost and nothing further comes from it.

It seems that at first I send out energy of desire that creates activity and attraction, but then I send out the opposite wish and it creates repulsion.

Likewise, I wondered why I only got very few matches with ethnic Danish women. I liked a whole lot of them on Tinder, so that was kind of strange to me. At first I would think: “Oh, they don’t like me!”

But then I realized it might be the other way around cause in many cases I did not really put my heart into it. I was more excited about exotic women with foreign backgrounds, and that might explain the matter in terms of energy.”

So to know your self is a key issue and from that we are able to focus our energy. But there is something more to it. Cause we do not align with our Vortex unless we are loving and positive.

Love and positivity
Abraham Hicks said that: “You cannot focus upon unwanted and be in the Vortex at the same time”. So, in other words to love and appreciate is another key issue, if you want your energy to flow from that inner being.

So, let’s have a few examples, Suzette tells us about that part of her life:

“The way of activating Law of Attraction is to show compassion and love. Love is the most precious thing a human can have. And if you have love in your heart at all times it will give the long lasting happiness compared to the happiness you may feel buying a new IPhone.

I visited a lady who lives alone in her apartment. She said: “It is so hard to be old, I am all alone, empty and feel unworthy in this life”.

But I held her hand and told her: “Do you know how lucky you are? You had a successful marriage and your children love you. And you know what? I am here for you to comfort you in your loneliness and emptiness.”

Another woman told me: “It is so nice to see a happy person coming to me today. You gave something that made my afternoon complete”. When we are happy, positive and optimistic we manifest ourselves as loveable beings.

I also met an old lady at work, and she was very sick. She couldn’t express her thoughts. I was moved when I saw tears falling from her eyes so I wiped it immediately. And following my intuition, I held her hand and told her “I am here for you”. She smiled at me and then lost her breath.”

The last example also goes to show how the flow of energy from your inner being turns into action. Suzette is able to act upon the situation even if the lady cannot express herself. It is intuition that guides her to comfort the old lady in her final hour.

This is what we gain from a loving attitude. And in the same way you will be able to act using intuition in your romantic love life. It will provide your perfect match.